Buhtt sex?
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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