Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
