Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
you would pick up someone in the library
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize