Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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