i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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