oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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