Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
