It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
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and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
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My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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