watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize