just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
