i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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