Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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