It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize