i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood