Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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