she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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