Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
