Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize