Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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