if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
