Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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