No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize