She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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