Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
