y did u give ur computer a hand job?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
PANTIES FOUND
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