He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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