As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
