Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
This toilet bowl is my home.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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