he wants to bone in the snuggie
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
