My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
