No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize
