Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
