I think i peed on brittanys purse
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
i need some magic done to my vagina
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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