That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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