I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize