So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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