Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize