i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
