Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
