Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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