By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
