the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
