You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
