I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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