You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
