He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
