it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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