Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
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