I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize