What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize