my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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